My husband cheats

Hey, guys! Cheating is not the only option.

None of this is, or was. I stayed with my husband, he stayed with me, we are still we. Because of what he did after his affair. And because I chose love. His remorse was all-encompassing and led him to recommit to our marriage. I guess you can call me lucky. That there was no pregnancy.

33 Sure Signs Your Husband Is Cheating

Miraculously, inexplicably, my love forged on. That was not of me, how could it have been? The ability to love like that is superhuman, God-like. And so via the grace of God, I possessed it, too. I did wonder after anger and even wandered around looking for it, but it never did show up to link arms with me in force.

That it was to be my new home. Nothing has ever broken my husband quite like breaking me, and it was there in his raggedness, face down in the arena, covered with dust and sweat and blood that my husband stood up, ignored his own gaping wounds and began laboring to heal mine.

Because love still existed between us and reigned supreme over my heart, nothing in me ever considered leaving my husband.

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Since I fell in love with W, I don't want sex with my husband. I only want W. I am afraid that my feelings for W are only infatuation. And I know that my husband, although he is rude and criticizing, is faithful. I know that the right thing to do would be to leave W and try to reignite my relationship with my husband. But I feel a strong urge to be with W.

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I feel I deserve some moments of happiness after all I have been through as an almost-single mom. I say to myself that as a single mom, I deserve to have a lover.

I can't possibly think of leaving W. We are coworkers and the work I do with him is crucial for my career.

I am so confused. Well, you're right. It sounds like you should be focusing on your marriage. I'm not saying you need to reignite anything or remain married I'm not sure of that at all , but I do think you need to figure out a plan with your husband. If you want to leave and have started to imagine an entirely different life, you need help. You can ask your husband to go to counseling.

You can be clear about your unhappiness.

Can You Get a Better Divorce Settlement If Your Spouse Cheated? -

You say you can't possibly think of leaving W, so I guess I can't argue with that. But you should know that he's just a distraction right now. Don't assume W can be your next husband, supporting you as you work and parent. W has done nothing to prove he can be in your world in a real way. You will likely feel like you're on an emotional rollercoaster for a while. It takes time to get beyond the pain of having an unfaithful mate.

My Spouse Cheated. Here’s Why I Didn’t Leave.

Don't expect the mixture of feelings and the mistrust to go away even if you're trying to forgive your partner and repair your marriage. Your marriage has changed and it is natural to grieve the relationship you once had. Being betrayed by your partner can induce rage. In your furious state, your first instinct may be to punish your mate by trash-talking him to friends or worse, on social media , or think about having an affair yourself to get even.

You may get a temporary sense of satisfaction from these sorts of actions, but ultimately they can work against you, keeping you in a state of anger instead of focusing on healing and moving on, alone or together. Think before you tell your family, as well. They will likely have strong opinions about what you should do—leave or stay.

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But nobody else really understands what goes on in another person's marriage. While you are pondering how you're going to proceed, it's best to keep the details private.

You may have some physical reactions due to stress such as nausea, diarrhea, sleep problems too little or too much , shakiness, difficulty concentrating, not wanting to eat, or overeating. Once the initial shock has passed, try your best to eat healthy foods, to stay on a schedule, to sleep regular hours, to get some exercise each day, to drink plenty of water, and, yes, to have some fun. Blaming yourself, your partner, or the third party won't change anything and it's just wasted energy.

Try not to play the victim, either, if you can help it, or wallow in self-pity. It will only make you feel more helpless and bad about yourself. This situation is between you and your partner and should not involve your children at all.

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